12/16/24 Dream: I had a dream that I was in a maid service for money, and I was serving this old Japanese man with a thick Ōsaka accent. I think his full name may have been like “〇〇, 黒川”or something like that. I couldn’t really say for sure, since I tended to merely address him as “ご主人様。”He was Perhaps a member of the yakuza too, judging by how affluent he was and how gargantuan his property was too. I remember he was sorta pleasant, but very unconventional in appearance for my gaijin standards. He seemed to be like 84, dressing in dapper clothes like suits fairly often, and while he looked nice enough, he was quite strict. I remember he would get mad at me for my fuckups, and frustrated with me if I didn’t wear my work uniform, which was a rather skimpy traditional French maid outfit. I stuck with it though, because he wasn’t transphobic or overly cruel, and he paid me good money. I remember I did a lot of traditional maid duties, like making him coffee or food, kneeling to be his footrest while he watched TV, being his surrogate wife when his proper wife wasn’t home, scrubbing his floors, lighting his cigarettes, and even reading to him at times. These duties came second nature to me, and weren’t all too bad, unless his wife was around. His wife would always be jealous of me, and would do nasty things like grab me by my throat and say transphobic things to me, or extinguish cigarettes into my cleavage. The worst part wasn’t the torture though, it was the fact I always had to respond with “ありがとうございます、お嬢様。” Every time, or else I would get beaten by the cruel lady for insubordination. The dream kept going like this for a while, with me being forced to be submissive as I did my duties, going day after day in this house. That was, until one day, I accidentally shattered an urn containing somebody’s ashes, and Mr. Kurokawa got extremely pissed at me. I fell to my feet in a dogeza position, expecting him to forgive me and just assign me more duty like last time. He didn’t end up doing that though, as he instead shackled my hands in front of my uniform and lead me over to a pillory in his foyer. He then released me, said something in japanese to the effect of “そこに行くよ、あなたが鬼的な女性だぜ,” and then gestured over to the pillory for me to get in. I did as I was told, not wanting him to involve the police. I placed my hands and head inside the slots of the pillory, and moved my feet towards the secondary shackles near the base of it. He then stared down at me with contempt and anger, as he locked the pillory over my head and hands. Now restrained, I struggled a bit out of instinct, but it was far too sturdy to shift myself. Then, he grabbed each foot with a firm grip and then shackled them firmly to the floor. It was at this point that I began sweating and shaking like a leaf, as I was scared of his wife approaching and beating me again. His wife wasn’t there though, as it was just him. I then heard him rustle through a nearby drawer, as he said something else in japanese that I think may have been directed at me, but it was unintelligible so I can’t really say for sure. Anyway, he managed to produce a wooden spoon from the drawer, and he held it in front of my face tauntingly. Next thing I knew, he began to smack me with the spoon, giving me numerous lashes on my breast and legs especially. I remember that I tanked each blow at first, counting them in my head, but before long, I had lost count and things just became a blur. I remember a few more hours of this discipline, trying to hold it together the whole time as my breasts became bruised and reddened from the lashes he gave. This continued, until nightfall, wherein he then said something to me in broken English, and in a thick japanese accent. I remember he spoke “Nightfall now. So, time for your break,” In a calm yet authoritative voice. He then stopped giving me lashes at this point, and merely began to caress my body with his gnarled hands, as he said various more things to me like “いいメイド” ＆ ”かわいい女中,” in an oddly soothing voice too. I then started to grow a mix of scared and aroused as I began to relax at his sudden change in demanor. My body unstiffened, as I then waited for him to release me. This release didn’t come though, as after another hour of a bitter and cold winter night, all that happened is that Mr. Kurokawa merely stripped me of my uniform (with the exception of my underwear), before he then started to smoke next to me, occasionally passing me a cigarette to smoke with him too. I felt uncomfortable physically, but oddly pleasant mentally when compared to before, as at least I wasn’t being beaten or shamed now. I went to take a nap from the lack of endorphins, nicotine euphoria, and an intense feeling sub drop within the dream, but as I did so, my vision began to fade as I woke back up into reality. FIN.
Dreams like the one you described can often seem strange and unsettling, containing elements of power dynamics, identity, and emotional expression. Here are some key themes and interpretations that may help unpack what this dream could signify for you:
Power and Submission: The dream explores themes of power dynamics and submission. Your role as a maid servicing a strict authority figure could symbolize your feelings about control in your life. This could reflect a situation where you feel subordinate or have to please someone in an authoritative position, whether in your personal or professional life.
Cultural Elements: The presence of a Japanese character and specific cultural references might indicate a connection to ideas about tradition, discipline, or honor. This could be an imagery relating to your perspectives on discipline, cultural expectations, or feelings of being an outsider ("gaijin" refers to a foreigner in Japan).
Fear and Anxiety: The fear of the wife’s jealousy and subsequent violence suggests feelings of inadequacy or anxiety about being judged. It can indicate your fears regarding competition, acceptance, or rejection in your social circles.
Conflict Between Roles: The juxtaposition of being treated well by Mr. Kurokawa yet subjected to his wife’s violence hints at an internal conflict. It may reflect a struggle between your desires for comfort and safety versus feelings of vulnerability and shame, perhaps in relation to an aspect of your identity.
Transgression and Punishment: Shattering the urn can represent a fear of making mistakes or facing significant consequences for your actions. The pillory as a form of punishment symbolizes public humiliation or a fear of being judged or punished for your identity and choices.
Sensation of Control: The shift from pain to a sense of comfort when Mr. Kurokawa ceases punishment could illustrate a complex relationship with pain and pleasure, perhaps hinting at exploring boundaries in relationships or an acceptance of vulnerability. These elements might also connect to how you handle stressful situations in waking life, balancing fear with the need for solace or acceptance.
Identity Exploration: The dream appears to confront complicated feelings about your identity (implied through your uniform and the dynamics of your roles). It suggests a deep dive into self-acceptance, societal expectations, or even how you relate to others based on your identity.
Ultimately, dreams are deeply personal, and their meanings can vary greatly between individuals based on personal experiences, emotions, and current life circumstances. Reflecting on what aspects resonate with you may help better understand how these themes manifest in your waking life.